Eight Reasons Why Personalized Shakespeare Is A Bad Idea

There's a link going around Twitter (no need to keep supporting it) about a project that creates personalized versions of classic novels - including Shakespeare - where you presumably get to swap out your name (and probably some key descriptive attributes) with some of the major characters, thus making the story about yourself.

Somebody didn't think this through. (Warning, PG adult language and content ahead!)

Julius Caesar ... because stabbing innocent people and bathing in their blood isn't like it was in the good old days.

Twelfth Night ... because you're a boy who's always wondered what it would be like to be a girl in love with a man who thinks you're a boy.

Taming of the Shrew ... because bitch knew her place!

Othello ... because you want to strangle your wife.

The Merchant of Venice ... because Jews are evil.

A Midsummer Night's Dream ... because you should be allowed to drug your wife when she won't give you what you want.

Romeo and Juliet ... because you want to sleep with a 13yr old girl.

Hamlet ... because your girlfriend is crazy, you'd like to kill her dad, and your mom has been looking hot lately.